Dream House

I deposited RM1,000 for my dream house which will be completed in 2016. By then, I would be financially ready, I hope. I am so excited. It has always been my dream to have a house on my own. So right at this very moment, I must start saving. I must learn to cut on my monthly expenses. I just can't wait. Owh, gosh. I have lotsssssssssss of ideas as how the house should be like. hihiihi

Gawai Rambling

It is Gawai now. But I am away, like miles away. Far far away from my family. I called my mum a while ago and she said she was busy cooking chicken rendang. Owh, I never thought that I could be emotionally affected. I thought I would not be missing home so much, like this much. This is my last semester studying in UPSI. But, 2 years not celebrating Gawai is something else. For the first year, I was excited to be here. Well, everybody would right? Come on!!! New university. New place. New environment. New friend. So, I wasn't bothered at all. 

But, now, I don't feel the excitement. I feel less motivated. I was so hesitant to fly. I do not know why.

I was like dragging my feet. Hmmmmm.. The only one thing that keeps me going is my parents. Their hope, their dream. Gosh, I could not afford to let them down. 

For a mediocre student like me, my first two semester weren't too bad at all. I got 3.34 for the first semester and later 3.94. Maybe 4.00 this semester?? kehkehkeh.. But, I could not help to feel this way. I am lucky though to have great friends around me. Otherwise, the next thing would be purchasing air ticket to fly to Sibu. 

All I could do now is to keep my finger-crossed that everything will be just fine. Everything will fall into places. This too shall pass...

Maharaja

Tersenyum melihat tingkah mereka,
Mengata bagai maha sempurna,
Sedangkan bila dia punya acara,
Semuanya caca merba sahaja.

Anehnya para manusia,
Diberi kuasa, mengadili pula sesuka rasa,
Sedangkan dia perlukan mereka,
Untuk tampak hebat di singgahsana
Mereka yang dia anggap hina,
Berbuat semua berkorban segala.

Di mana harga diri mereka?
Bila memerlu, dia yang hina dipuja,
Muka masam menjadi semanis gula,
Tanpa malu, tanpa sekelumit rasa berdosa,
Meminta apa adanya agar kekal megah di angkasa...

Aku yang hina tidak mahu sengketa,
Sekadar melaksana amanah memperkasa anak bangsa,
Biarlah apa kata mereka,
Biarlah nampak bodoh kerana menurut kata,
Biarlah apa jua tanggapan semua,
Ku relakan demi DIA Sang Pencipta,
Bukan mereka yang bermuka dua....

Tika tiada

Jangan tika perpisahan melambai,
Jangan tika dia lena dalam permai,
Baru air mata berderai,
Baru cinta tersemai,
Walau sekuat mana rindu membadai,
Dia telah pergi dengan damai...

Jangan terlewat waktu baru merayu,
Ketika itu dia tiada lagi di situ...

Embracing defeat

I am now releasing my emotional turbulence and restoring peace. Walking home without trophies after tonnes of efforts is not an easy thing. I practically dedicated so much of my precious times improving on the texts for both debate and public speaking competitions. 

Accepting defeat is always tough. I could hardly learn that winning is not everything. I may appear to be very competitive. But, I believe I would be just fine if the juries could justify and fairly reason out why we failed to advance to the semi-final for this year debate. But the same-old-shit from the PRAISEWORTHY, COMMENDABLE and WISE judges appalled me. It leads me to think that if you do not know what you are doing, you better refuse the responsibility. It was indeed a very poor judicial decision. 

Nevertheless, we won the heart of many. Other escorting teachers from other schools were also taken aback by their bad judging. At least I find my comfort in their heart-warming comments. Thanks, St. Anthony and Maradong for the faith you have in us.

Anyway, I am blessed to be surrounded by eager spirits. I wholeheartedly thank Fletchelle,Remni, Elijah, Ian and Ajai for your commitment and courage to take up the debating challenge. Let's do the comeback!!! Let's fly high next year!!! I have had a great time coaching you. Well, it is not our lost, it is theirs. To me, YOU ARE THE CHAMPION!!!! Till then, see you in 2014. Owh, wait, Mooting Competition in Kuching awaits us!!!! 

To Rawiyani @ Boboi, watching you delivering your thoughts on the stage was very uplifting. It is not easy to stand in front of a huge crowd; presenting your speech in your second language. This is your first time and I think it was effortlessly done. I am beaming with pride! Thanks for your efforts!

After all, this is a learning experience. Of this, I could not agree more. We will improve on our weaknesses and yea, let us bring home some trophies next year, aite?? (Hahahaha, I still want to WIN!!!)